Monthly Archives: April 2014

What’s that you say?

A noise coming from the washing machine?

Well yes, but it was a different kind of noise this time. Not the bumpity bump noise that comes from an uneven load. Similar, yet quieter.

More scratchier.

From my seat in the living room my first thought was that one of the animals was dying.

I could see all but Wally so he was obviously in the washing machine desperately scratching away at the sides of the drum as he entered the final spin cycle. It did smack me as slightly odd that he hadn’t attempted to escape before the spin, but probably the suds had muddled his senses.

I found him in the hallway lounging in the sun patch.

So I stood by the laundry room door and strained to listen. Senses on high alert. But nothing.

So I ignored it.

This morning I found the necklace I made last week.

Newly washed.

I hadn’t liked it and it had stayed in my pocket as I wondered what to do with it.

It is nice and sparkly now albeit missing one half of its chain.

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So if any of you are wondering if you can wash your turquoise on the normal setting.

Yes you can, just be sure to put it in a little baggy first so that the chain doesn’t disappear in the machine workings and cause a flood later.

And this, people, is why I shouldn’t be in charge of the laundry – or any other house hold duties come to that.


For all of you who were worried.

I made it!

My usual hygienist was there, (for some reason I thought she’d gone), and, who would have guessed it, but I decided that I really liked the evil dentist man.

I didn’t even need a filling!

Double bonus right there.

I did feel a bit shattered though. I had to come home and have a cup of tea, three advil, and an English chocolate bar,

Nestle-Aero-MintChocolate

just to sooth my nerves you understand.


Got a lot of woes.

My dentist, and good friend, left. She retired. Went off to have fun.

With not a thought of what will happen to me.

Same as the woman who cut my hair.

Both gone!

(Although, to be fair, the hair cutting woman had to run away to another state for scary reasons so I have almost forgiven her.)

I am left feeling abandoned. Alone to face my fears.

Will my hair cut be o.k.? Will the new man who has to look into my mouth hurt me?

I can barely stand it.

I don’t like the new dentist. I might only have seen him once, and he might not have actually done anything in my mouth yet, but I know a scary dentist man when I see him.

My first dentist was a Mr. Houlihan. A very tall imposing man who tried to tell me that dreaming of fairies when I had to be put to sleep with the gas mask thingy was definitely the way to go for a great being put to sleep with the gas mask thingy while someone fiddles in your mouth experience.

Little did he know of my excessively bizarre imagination.

I dreamt of Death Fairies. Yes, you know the ones. The dark, twisted, evil, fairies that wait until you are feeling safe and then jump out at you and scare the s*^# out of you so that you can never walk with confidence into a room again without first giving it the once over.

And even then it’s touch and go.

I called him Mr Hooligan.

I might have been only six, but I know a scary dentist man when I see one.

And now I have to go see another one.

Just for a cleaning they say, but we all know what that means.

Sharp pointy things that gouge away at your gums. Water spurted nonchalantly down your throat to choke you just when you think you’ve gotten through the worse part, and the sucky vacuum thing that comes too late to stop the choking and just makes you look like an idiot when you close your mouth around it and it makes your eyes pop out with surprise when your lips shut tight around the tube. (Do they even clean that thing?)

All the while the hygienist is chatting away as though all of this is normal.

Then he, the scary dentist man, has to come in to frown at you in disapproval because you don’t floss and tell you that you need a filling.

Man!

Why did I have to have teeth in the first place.

And nobody can help you. Nobody can say, hey, I’ll go have your teeth cleaned for you.

You’re on your own.

:(

So think of me at 11 o’clock (set your watches, that’s Houston central time), as I sit in the chair of doom for another fun hour of torture.

Don’t look, I’m going to cry now.

A new one beginning.

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And, and old one coming along.

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Still unhappy about the dentist.

:(


Working on another one.

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I am getting closer to finishing one. Really I am.

Right now I’m concentrating on putting chains on my pendants, but deciding on the length of chain causes me anxiety.

Maybe that’s why I’ve gone into a decline.

Too much worry.

So I leave it, and now I have five hundred and sixty three thousand necklaces to finish before the art festival in May.

I wanted to take some of my paintings to the show as well, but that’s giving me anxiety also.

I suppose you could say that I’m a bit of an anxious person really.

Not sure though.


I’m still here.

I’ve just gone into a bit of a decline.

It happens.

Working on a few drawings.

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But really I want to be able to paint like this.

Damian Elwes

Damian Elwes

 

Just going to have to be brave and go for it I suppose.


I can’t tell you what a relief it is.

I’ve just cleaned up my mail box and deleted all

5,063!!!

messages.

I keep them because I just know I’m going to have to go through them more carefully than just a brief glance just in case they’re important.

Well.

After a (5,063) while it becomes pretty clear that you’ve missed the boat anyway, and that anything that was important is now well gone.

The anxiety is draining.

Now, I’m light and free and ready to hoard more e mails.

So bring ’em on!

I’ve been making, and painting, I even talked to the new neighbours, whom I thought had moved in about three weeks ago, but apparently it was before Christmas.

This is one of the consequences of being a bit of a hermit.

The world happens all on its own as I sit hammering and pastel-ing away in my studio engulfed in my imaginary world of man-eating triffids.

This is one.

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And another.

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Oh yes, they look so sweet, but in fact they will turn on you at any time.

 

See.

And this is why you have to lock yourself away in the studio, because you never know what the new neighbours have brought with them on their shoe from when that last meteorite smashed into their previous back garden.


Finishing up.

Now I’ve got the fire back I was able to finish a couple of things I’d started.

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Crazy Lace Agate – Front.

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Back

And I don’t know what this is, but I bought these little drilled river pebbles and wanted to use them in something.

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Do you think they’re all getting a little weird?


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