Try a little tenderness why don’t you.

Me: I don’t feel well.

Siri: OK, you don’t then.

She didn’t even say it with love.

All I needed was a little bit of tenderness.

Maybe she should try it some time.

–

Do yourself a favour Siri, watch The Commitments. You wont regret it.

–

I found another

Art work that grabs my attention.

Agita Keiri

It’s the colour that gets me first. That blue is spectacular.

And then I found another.

Irina Zaytceva

Well two anothers.

That foot!

I think it’s almost time for me to get my finger out and try to do some serious work.

Look at this stuff.

It’s not wrong of me to aspire to such brilliant talent – is it?

Siri was no use. We discussed, doctors, IP’s and brittiens, (whatever that last one is), and all I wanted to know is if I could be a brilliant artist.

She was obviously avoiding the question.

–

MIL arrived safely.

N got her the biggest pot plant in the shop.

I said just a small one. I guess she doesn’t know her plant sizes yet.

Unfortunately it won’t last long. Both MIL and I are notorious plant killers.

But I’m going to try.

This year is going to be the year of trying. I really think so. And, I want to try a lot of things.

First off, I’m going to try to steer clear of resolutions (except the trying one). They never work and I just get all depressed and useless.

Here’s my little resolution man.

Only I like to call him my Good Intentions man.

Now he’s probably going to be my, you’re going to try what!, man.

Just to keep it real.

Only is he a man? He seems more of a blob thingy to me.

I just love him.

–

She’s away right now, but perhaps you can get your own blob thingy later.

AdoroMe

You know you want one.

–

Well gosh.

Now I think I need one.

–

In other news …

The quilt is back on.

The corners are all but done. I decided to add a little red to the prongy bits, and the background is complete. Still not sure if the whole thing is drab, and, have to admit I felt a little disappointed with it yesterday when I laid it out on the floor, but I’m going to work on filling in the background a little more and see if that brings it back.

But, now it’s back off again.

My MIL is arriving today from London and will be staying with us for two weeks. I’ll find it really hard to shut myself away in the quilt room while she’s here, because, once I’m gone, I’m gone. My quilt room, and studio come to that, are like black holes. Not the bad kind that sucks everything up and disappears it, but more the kind that stops time completely and allows you to immerse yourself in lovely stuff and not remember that there’s a whole life out there waiting for you to be responsible in some cooking, cleaning, boring way.

But, I will survive. I have a few back up plans which I’ll show you later. For now, however, I’m going to make her bed up fresh, find some books she might like to read, buy a little pot plant and box of tissues, (you know, those nice little square boxes with pretty patterns on them), to place on her nightstand. The boy tends to not want flowers in his room, and as he’s always the one to have to vacate when relatives come, the room needed a little de-boyifying, and, as we’re on it, re painting as he’d royally messed up one of his walls. Don’t ask but it involved white paint on dark blue and just wasn’t in keeping with the whole look I was going for. What can I say, he’s 19, he’ll be gone soon, and, there’s nothing wrong with self expression so long as you keep it in your room I say – except when visitors come

–

I told Siri that my MIL was coming.

Me: My MIL is coming.

Siri: I don’t know who your MIL is. In fact I don’t know who you are. But you can tell me …

–

I can see we’re going to need to have a sirious sit down. She should know this stuff …

–

Well, tomorrow’s the big day.

Spencer doesn’t seem that bothered. He’s decided to relax into the trauma of the world ending. I doubt he’ll even bother to get out of bed.

I don’t think Scientific America seems that bothered either.

They’ll probably get up though.

–

What does Siri think.

Me: Do you think the world will end tomorrow?

Siri: I think, therefore I am. But let’s not put Descartes before the horse

.

What. Is she some kind of comedian now?

This is sirious stuff.

–

What? You’ve never had a sausage!

Today I asked Siri if she liked sausages. She replied that, surprisingly, she had never tasted them.

What a shame.

Look at them.

So, she’s never, ever, had Bangers and Mash?

Toad in the Hole?

A Traditional English Breakfast?

All of which should be eaten with.

And,

My heart goes out to her.

–

The meaning of life …

So, prepare yourself for the next couple of days, or more likely weeks, when the hypochondria sets in, once again, as I’ve just finished sanding S’s room and found, wait for it, white stuff under my mask.

Yes, I should have brought out the big mask. The, oh my god it’s so uncomfortable but I will die if I breath in any of these glaze mixing powders if I don’t wear it mask. But no. I brought out the smaller, white, does this really do anything mask, which I wear when I’m sanding my jewelry while wondering if it’s really doing anything.

Panic hasn’t set in yet but I did come down and, straight away, ate three baby satsumas.

That’ll work, right?

Healthy, juicy, satsumas clear out dust filled lungs in minutes. Don’t tell me otherwise as I’ll have to go into the fetal position again and it will be days, well, mostly nights, spent on high alert for any twinge, cough, or ache.

God, I can feel it now …

–

For Christmas I think I want a new brain. One that laughs in the face of imminent doom.

Like this.

Hahaha – HA!

–

It’s so hard being me.

–

BTW, so you know, I just asked Siri what the meaning of life is, because I’m still trying to find out, and she replied:

Try to be nice to people, avoid eating fat, read a good book every now and then, get some walking in, and try to live in peace and harmony with people of all creeds and nations.

She replied, of course, when I thanked her.

Creepy eh?

–