And what exactly happened here?

You went into the quilt shop for white background fabric, and?

So you’re trying to tell me that tangerine is the new white?

O.K.

I’ll buy that.

–

Amazingly tidy quilt table.

Look at it now, because it won’t last long.

–

First cup of tea.

(Actually my third. I’d already had two before I even made it to the quilt room).

Then I continued to make flowers and arrange them on the new white background.

I think it’s getting there, but the orange certainly surprised me.

So I had to have another cup of tea.

And I’m still not sure.

So I walked away for the day and went into the studio instead.

And made a bracelet.

I also found a (very) old photograph of me when I was at art school.

Could I look more grubby?

That jacket cost me 50p at the Help the Aged shop in Winchester. It was an old dustman’s jacket. My sister wouldn’t walk next to me when I wore it.

I have no idea why.

–

 

More tea Vicar?

So I woke up this morning thinking that I’d got it all wrong and the art festival was today after all.

Well, I’d be a bit late that’s for sure.

It all started because, for a month now, I kept telling myself, and everyone else, that the show was going to be on the 27th, but then I got my acceptance letter and it said it was on the 5th of May. Of course, because I just knew they’d messed up, I still worried that it was on the 27th. Yes, I did go to the, maybe they’re trying to squeeze me out by giving me the wrong info, place but, only for a fraction of a small paranoid moment, and then I told all my peeps that the 5th it was.

However, panic set in as I sat here this morning, drinking my tea, thinking about life, the universe and everything, and how much jewelry I have hanging around yet I can’t seem to stop making it, and how on earth will I ever get rid of it all, and will the finale of, The Following, be as good as we expect it to be or just another false alarm, when suddenly I just knew the festival was today and I’d blown one of my only chances to sell some of the darn stuff.

Yes, I only do one festival. Time to re-think that now that I’m a recovering super-chicken.

This, and the bizarro dreams, has led me to believe that I may, perhaps, just a smidgen, most likely have a little, (like this much         ),  anxiety problem.

Me thinks more tea is in order.

Poster Pop on Etsy

Don’t worry, I checked and it is the 5th.

–

I’m drinking my tea right now out of this,

Magpie Pottery

It’s my new favourite. The size is perfect, the rim is the optimal thickness, it has a pleasing shape, and, most importantly, just look at that bird. As we all know, these are exactly the requirements needed for great tasting tea.

–

Yesterday I cleaned the studio even more than I did the last time by getting out the little blue shop vac and actually vacuuming the floor. Man it was bad. First I had to vacuum the filter of the vacuum. It was so chocked up with stuff from previous, garage related, vacuuming that it wouldn’t suck up a feather. So I got out the big orange shop vac and vacuumed the insides of the blue one. It was kind of like a dad giving his kid a good once over before sending him out into the real world. I have now decided to keep the little blue one for myself. P can have the big one. I haven’t told him yet as I know he’s very possessive of his ‘toys’.

Then I made this.

with a green t-shirt on!

Now, this may not sound extraordinary to you, but to my close peeps, this is huge, right? And, yesterday it was a dusty red one!

Perhaps this is why I’m having the, (this big          ) anxiety stuff going on right now.

Maybe it’s back to black today.

Which leads to ….

For your entertainment.

O.K. so perhaps the whole funeral thing isn’t that entertaining, but it’s still good.

Happy Friday people.

:)

(N.B. So, it’s Saturday. See, anxiety right there ….)

–

Hold that short news.

I haven’t abandoned this blog to the Reluctant Caveman. I’m just having trouble juggling the two of them.

Once my 30 days are up, (yes, I’m in prison. All tea privileges are taken away) I will be back in force.

With new lovelies.

Such as this.

And, this.

And I will have glorious tales of victory and defeat, and anger and frustration, and joy and …

What ever.

So, hold tight, keep strong, and lets hope this new diet doesn’t take me out completely.

–

My cuppeth is emptyeth.

And yes, K, this is exactly how I feel.

So, in a nutshell,

I’m going to this wedding and it’s in Spain, and I just can’t get my head around what I’m going to wear because I still haven’t lost the weight I would like to lose, and so I don’t want to go, but, it’s my brother in law’s wedding and I like him, and I like her, and they’ve asked us to be witnesses, which is an honour, but I’d rather be dead than wear anything other than my jeans and black t shirt which have been a staple for years now and I don’t think I’ll be able to get away with that in Spain and at a wedding … (breathe).

And, when I say staple, I mean staple. I don’t think I’ve even seen my legs.

(O.K. I have).

Now, this is a problem for me. A BIG problem. I mean, would you go to your child’s wedding in jeans and a black t shirt? No. Which means I can’t either. I’ve told all three of them that they would be happier, believe me, to just run away somewhere, get married, then come back and tell me.

But, I don’t think that’s going to fly.

And now there’s this wedding – in Spain.

Now, I’m not that heavy, really I’m not, and I’m not that vain. But, it’s a kind of body dysmorphia thing. You know the one where everyone else looks great except you. In fact, you think you look hideous, and not just in a, what was she thinking, kind of way, but more in the Hunchback of Notre Dame way. Sorry Hunchback.

And, when I remember to think about this, I’m miserable.

I can get by with it most of the time as I don’t have to go out. I can go to my studio and ignore myself. But, I feel really uncomfortable doing most other things – especially weddings. Why do people have to do that? It just messes me up completely.

So K, who studies health and nutrition, said she could help me. I thought that by losing a few pounds it would help me to start getting over this whole what the #*^^’s wrong with you problem, and, when she offered her help, I thought, how hard can it be …

As a nutritionist, I imagined she would say, O.K. eat a bit more of this, a little less of this – I was even ready to go to, a lot less than this, but I should have known.

Now I’m on the Whole 30.

No. Don’t talk to me about it. I’m not listening. It’s already annoying me.

You see, it’s the tea.

No milk.

And, there you have it. My only comfort in life, gone. Snuffed out with two simple words – no dairy.

Here is my lovely new cup.

Empty.

Magpie Pottery

It’s the end of the world as I know it.

And K, don’t you mention the C word again..

:(

–

NOTES:

First day: Thick head. Depression (probably because I feel sorry for myself and don’t like being told what to do). And, this morning –  the second day – aches and pains down the outsides of both legs, and, if I might say, buttocks.

If I die on this K, you’ll be hearing from me …

–

Thursday, and all is well.

Crisis over.

I’ve priced all of my jewelry so I’m good to go on Saturday to the art festival, if it doesn’t rain.

I’ve had my hair cut. (Haven’t actually taken a good look at it yet so I’m hoping it’s o.k.).

I’m about to have a cup of tea.

Then I’m off out to the studio.

It’s going to be a good day.

:)

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